Difficulties in creating the schedule

[Finland-Hanne]

Hello and thanks for your help in advance!

I have discovered Anna only few weeks ago and I will try her sleeping training method soon with our 10 month old son.

Now I'm trying to create a schedule which I find difficult because usually our son Sampo can be awake about 3-4 hours between sleeps and then the eating periods should be every 3,5 hours, so therefore he'd be a sleep at the same time when he should be eating.

Now we have rather steady eating routines but the naps depends on so much when he wakes up. During the nights I'm not feeding him (buffing helps calming him), but after 6am I find it difficult -sometimes he wakes up happy after 6 and sometimes he's crying and I lift him next to me and give him milk. Sometimes milk calms him and we sleep 2-3 more hours...and sometimes we wake up then and come back for a 2 hour nap after being 1,5 hours awake.

Because the mornings are so different, the rest of the naps differ a lot. Usually though he takes two naps (in addition to this morning nap). They differ from 0,5 hours to 1,5 hours.

Also what I find difficult is that nowadays we have 5 meals a day; breakfast-porridge (not exact time, depends when he wakes up), lunch at 11, snack at 14, dinner at 17 and porridge at 20. He usually goes to sleep at 21-21.30. I really would like to keep the porridge (the 5th meal) in the schedule as well, because he likes that a lot!

Currently he's sleeping in the same room with us but as we start the sleeping training he will have his own room with good curtains to make the room dark. Hopefully the curtains will help him sleep better after 6 am, as it is difficult to assure him: go back to sleep, it's night eventhough the room is light.

Hopefully someone understood my explanation and could give me few ideas for the schedule!

[annawahlgren]

Welcome, dear Finland-Hanne

I suggest you read and learn from the book, which is now available in both English and Finnish.

The idea with the GNS-cure is that you take the lead. You ponder of and establish the schedule out of the foreseeable needs of the child - not out of his present sleeping and eating "habits" that change like the wind from day to day (and night to night)

So, read, learn, understand - and read again; then, if and when you feel totally prepared and ready to start the Cure, take the lead accordingly and just see it through

Your child will thank you for it (only not in the first two days of total confusion)

Good luck and welcome back once you made the decision!


O:)

[Finland-Hanne]

Thank you Anna

I'm almost there with the right attitude and state of mind...! I haven't read the whole book yet, just the parts which are the most applicable to a child of Sampo's age. I have also read the GNS-material available here -I will however read it once more.

Thanks for letting me know that making the schedule is totally up to me, and I shouldn't look too much (or at all) the old routines. What a relief, because they really (at least sleeping) change a lot.

Few questions; our bedroom is totally on the other side of our house than Sampo's (future) room. Should I sleep closer to his room at least the first few nights of the Cure process in order to able to jingle very soon? Is there any risk that Sampo is able to fall from his cot when sleeping alone in his room?

I will go and work with the schedule! Many thanks!

[annawahlgren]

The first two nights you cannot sleep at all, but have to be constantly alert and awake

Please read the book from the first line to the last. And preferably, over and over again


O:)

[Finland-Hanne]

Hello!

The decision was made and the Cure was started five days ago, so this is the fifth night and I feel like needing some support. Everything started suprsingly well but now I feel like the process is stuck, no advancement after the second night.

The daily routines/schedule works well, despite the fact that Sampo (almost 11 months) is tired throughout the whole day (and especially in the morning and the evening).

When he goes to sleep, "the question/answer-session" lasts about 10 minutes. One thing that worries me is that tonight Sampo started to cry already when entering his bedroom

Then he sleeps well untill about five. Before that he may wake up once but falls a sleep again rather easily. After five it gets more and more difficult. First he wakes up/is crying every 20 minutes, then after 10 and finally after 5 minutes. This continues untill about 6.45 and at that time he is really really sad and mad and crying a lot. We go and awake him up and try to make him happy and smiley but it's really difficult because he is so tired and upset. He continues crying/sobbibg untill he gets his breakfast at 7.30.

The first nights I did the jingling right after he woke up and made his first noice but now I'm not reacting so soon anymore. Therefore I don't feel like being stuck behind his door. I'm confident and desperately wanting to reach the goal. Shall I just be patient or should I try music: put on some classical(?) music after five?

Thank you!! Love, Hanne

[Finland-Hanne]

I forgot to write down our shcedule:

7.30 breakfast
9.15-10.00 naps outside
11.00 lunch
12.30-14.30 naps outside (usually he sleeps only 1,5 hours)
14.30 snack
17.30 dinner
19.00 bath, porridge, milk
20.00 going to bed

Thanks

[videunge]

Hello

I have got a question for you. Is his bedroom as black as it can possibly be? Just a tiny light can cause the child to think that its morning. You can go into the room when its daytime an then you will easily see where the light comes in. If the window is a problem, you can spray some water on it and then apply a (thick) black plastic bag on it. 8)

Well,yes Mozart works fine in the early morning. At the wery first noise you hear from him, tell hom the jingle imediately. If he continues to cry you turn the music on. as he calmes down you turn the volume down to follow. When he falls asleep yuo can leave it on for some time.

Or you can wait and listen to him. If he starts screaming when you tell hom the jingle yuo can go out of bed and make som noise, perhaps vaacumcleaning or anything else that makes a really good noise. When he falls asleep yuo can go to bed.

Then of course, dont forget to let him help you with a lot of things so he feels that he´s reaaly needed, and to go outside every day

good luck! ( and I´m really sorry that you got an answer in a terrible english but I hope that you get something out of it )

[Finland-Hanne]

Wau! I already got a reply many thanks!

I just read over again parts of Anna's book and the GNS-manual...I realized I have to be more patient and stronger.

We tried to make to room as dark as possible with window blinds and darkening curtains. However, some light comes from under the curtains.

I will try the music and the plastic bags. Sampo is participating on the house-hold work and we spend time outside couple times a day (on top of naps).

Your English was good and I understood your points! Thank you

[Finland-Hanne]

Hello, it's me again!

Status update: Sampo goes to sleep easily, thank you for that! Naps are going fine, what a relief! During the night he may wake up few times but falls back to sleep on his own or after jingling BUT he always wakes up around 5.00 crying hard and I'm not able to calm him down Jingling, won't work, buffing won't work (I've left the room and also stayed there and done buffing for a long time), music won't work.. (I haven't tried the vacuuming, it feels just too weird to do that in the middle of the night).

So what I do, I pretend as it's morning, open curtains, pick him up and breastfeed him. Sometimes he falls a sleep next to me in the bed. Sometimes not, then I put him to a baby pushchair/wagon/cart (whatever they are called) and walk inside the house untill he falls a sleep. He won't fall a sleep easily though, it takes about 15-45 minutes. Once he falls a sleep, he sleeps untill 6.30-7.00.

I give him milk, because the breakfast is at 7.30 so I think he would become hungry before that because it takes a while before he falls a sleep again. But soon I will quit the breastfeeding, and then what??

I know it takes time before everything goes smoothly and he will sleep straigt untill 7.00 but right now I would need some words of help, wisdom, advice and hope!

Thank you in advance! BTW, I have recommeded Anna's book and the GNS-method for all my friends!

[TorsMamma]

Hi,

What and how much food do you give him during the day?

Is the bedroom really Pitch black? (especially at 05 in the morning)

Now you have tought him that waiking up at 05 is morning. He will not sleep over this clock by him self, you will have to somehow teach him. How do you figure on doing that?

By doing too much at 05 such as buffing, jingleing it does announce that morning has come.
So the strategy for early mornings are, 1 jingle and then LOUD Mozart or Strauss. Or vacum cleaning.
The child needs something else to listen to than his own cry. Then you turn the noise down as he turns the cry down.

[Finland-Hanne]

Thank you Torsmamma, thank you!

You are absolutely right that now he thinks the 5 o'clock awake is a routine and then it's time for milk. I have realized that too.

OK, I will try this with the music and if that doesn't help then with vacuum cleaning! Is it best to set the CD player outside of his room but close to the door?

But what if he doesnt't calm down? We have had so many mornings when the cry turns hysterical and then it's really difficult to calm him down in any way....

The room is black -we have window blinds and darkening curtains. The only small light comes from the door -the door is a little bit open. Should it be totally closed?

You asked about his eating. Breakfast: we offer 215g porridge, but he eats only half (because of the breastfeeding at 5...). Lunch: 75-125g baby food and 75-100g fruits/berries. Snack: 125g fruits/berries + banana/some bread. Dinner: 75-125g baby food. Before going to bed: 200g porridge.

He still eats the very fine baby food (up from 4-6 months old) because he trows up the 8 month old food with biggers pieces on it. Sampo turns 12 months in few weeks and we are trying also to teach him to eat normal home food. He likes eating bread on his own so almost on every meal he also eats some bread. I still breastfeed him after every meal but that will be replaced with a regular milk.

Please let me know if you have any comments regarding the dining! Before starting the Cure eating was problematic. Now he eats better but still not huge amounts.

Thank you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! -Hanne-

[TorsMamma]

Hi,

Yes, close the door ALL the way. Pitch black. Some even have to roll a towel and put at the bottom of the door.
Set the CD player right outside the room. Perfect!

My son didn't like pices in his food either so I would by jar food and mix it with my mixer. But you can put some olive oil och non salted butter in the food to boost him up a little.

Next, feed him faster. Don't wait for him to swallow before presenting the next spoon of food. Just put it in no pause no nothing. Give as much food as he eats, don't stop until he stops. Then you give as much fruit as you can.

Classical music something happy like Strauss really loud should do it.
If you would rather you can take 1-2 nights where you go directly in his room and do the sun feather until he falls asleep again and then count to 100 before you let go. Out with a super soft jingle. This to show him he really needs to sleep again. Then night 3 you use the jingle and music.

Would that feel better for you? You might have to stand with the sun feather for 45-60 min or more the first time. But that is not unusual.

Good luck with tonight. Keep it dark. closed door. the jingle you say should be lound enough to hear through.

[Finland-Hanne]

Thank you for your quick reply!

What is the sun feather? Is that buffing?

Yes, I feel more comfortable with this softer method -thanks for telling me about it!

BTW, when he wakes up the few times during the night before 5, should I let him cry and calm down on his own, or should I still use the jingling? I have now waited for a while and if he doesn't calm down, then I have done the jingling for 1,2 or 3 times depending on situation. Should the confirmation jingling be done as well (the last one, when he stays quiet) every time?

Thanks also for the eating tips!

[TorsMamma]

Hi,
The sun feather is what you do after buffing (can be seen AW doing at the end here.)

http://www.annawahlgren.com/index.php/v ... -solfjader

Sometimes the buffing gets overused and works only when doing it and when you stop the child screams like crazy. Then you do the sun feather and just stand there with Yoga breathing. Loud and calm. Watch the video clip.

You do the jingle when you feel like perhaps going in the room now. The jingle is always X4 so you say 3 verses and on the 4th you do the confirmation combined. The jingle is always a minimum off X4. But can be as many as X20 or more if needed. You should have a dialogue with the jingle during the night now.
Exceptions are early mornings when you are too close to the morning.
So no more separate confirmation is needed if he understands the jingle now.

[Finland-Hanne]

Thanks again!

I will do the sun feather first. It will be though really difficult to keep Sampo in the right position. It's amazine, how strong babies are!!

Good luck is needed