SOS ! We failed once again

[Bluebell]

Hello
I am mother of 22 months and 7 months old girls.
I am absolutely desperate to get some sleep . Actually nobody had any sleeps since second daughter was born.
A friend told me about the book. I read it twice.
Last past two weeks we were trying ... But the results are bad. It's even worst then before we started.
We tried everything as in the book step by step, but non of the girls settles like book says they cried both for hours, unit they vomit, older girl even started bleeding from her nose, so it's abolutely nightmare.
I can not do this buffing jingle etc anymore as it leads us to a disaster. It drives me mad looking at my screaming girls . They never sleep. Especially younger one, she has about 5hours sleep in 24, all together by 20 min naps.
Maybe I'm stupid, maybe I'm doing something wrong or maybe my girls will never sleep in their beds ever.
Maybe it won't work for my girls.
We live in London, UK.
If anybody knows some licenced curers or somebody is confident with gns I would pay money for giving us some help

[Luvisen]

Hello Bluebell and welcome!

All children can and want to sleep. Ofcourse they will sleep. They are overtired, that's what makes it hard.

I suggest you contact a curer by phone to started with some coaching over the phone so you have a clear strategy on adressing this chaos. We don't have one in the UK but at least this lady speaks english:
Mrs Green
Hannah Green
Brooklyn, NY
USA
hannahgreen80@gmail.com

Strength and warmth!/Luvisen

[Bluebell]

Thank you very much =D>
We got in touch with this nice lady and will hopefully get some advice.
I want to write some more about situation in our home.
I am reading the GNS book third time now. As English is not my first language maybe I am not getting everything so clear. My husband read ir once and last Saturday we tried the cure again, younger daughter 7 month old Kotryna,it was ok , she woken up six times, but he helped her to get back to sleep. The seventh wake up was bad. She cried, then screamed screamed and screamed. Louder and louder , my husband was trying everything as book suggest and It lasted 55 minutes and at the end Kotryna started vomiting, she was shivering, still screaming and choking. sorry, but we couldnt continue this way, he picked her up, I almost rung ambulance I thought she will die. the rest of the night she was kind of crying in my arms and nobody achieved anything. She has a severe gastro reflux condition and has regular medication to stop acid burn. At night time she gets her medication sometimes needs to be carried and we hold her upright, to help pain. From birth she had some serious problems, lots of medications, doctors, hospitals, pains, and some time she used to cry 18 hours in 24.
Things are slightly better these days. She needs to be cured properly, but tell me guys, how long could we continue when things get so bad that baby is vomiting and really looks ill?


Actually the night before when we wanted to cure Charlotte things ended much quicker. First of all she wouldn't give up her dummy ( pacifier) away.
She never sleeps in her cot as she is scared of it since she was six months old.

[Bluebell]

Sorry for all typing mistakes

I started talking about older daughter Charlotte, nearly 2 , and as I say we hidden all the dummies and explain her that she is big girl and don't need it anymore and she will sleep without it. " baby forgets about pacifier in one night" the moment when she realised that I am seriously not giving her dummy for sleeping time she started to scream. Scream and scream. Badly. I put her in her cot and she stands all body hard as a stone and screams, I was talking, saying jingles etc but she just stands here screams. Not so long later she vomited all her dinner quite painfully , begged for dummy, I still managed to tidy up her bed without taking her out, she was screaming even louder, became all blue, was cofing , choking and started bleeding from her nose. All this chaos lasted about an hour she got her dummy back, went to sleep with me in parents bed. All this week she cries badly if she don't have at least two pacifiers with her and became very protective of them. She screams if I am trying to get her anywhere near her bed. I cant put her in her cot anymore. How to deal with these kinds of dizasters
Charlotte never slept well, but things got worse when she was six months old. She was ill in hospital for a week with rehydration drip by needle in her head fighting for her life in hospital cot attached. Since then she refused sleep in cot. I tried all possible things, bought new cot, new mattress, new bedding even got in the cot myself. She just would scream until vomits. She suffers from severe reflux swell. Lots of medication in the past. All common treatments failed for my girls , as stomach bioscopy s shows bad reflux And inflammations all normal medication just don't work and give bad sides effects.
My girls don't eat. Feeding them until milk is virtually bursting from her ears, as said in the book - is impossible for us. As kotryna is getting better with her food, Charlotte is still underweight and survives on occasional piece of toast or sip of her special French milk.
We had many doctors, nutritionist involved in the past but nothing helped. She refuse food, any food. She never ever ate her meal full. We hVe better days sometimes. She once refused food for 12 days just drinking some water which we forced to her, and lost nearly a third of her body weight and we had a week in intensive care unit to get back to life but ....
Ayway. If someone managed to read my story till the end - bravo [-o<
To sum up they both are very precious, especially Charlotte with all big and little problems, and I don't know how even to start doing cure with her as she is so stubborn.

Any advices are more then welcome

[Bluebell]

So what's next #-o
Shall I try once again
I'm getting more and more confident , some phrases from the book sits in my head all day as I learn ir by heart
Let's say if we try once again the coming Saturday , shall we do both of them in the same room the same night? Or one by one?

I have now a pretty strong schedule for all day and trying to get them to have as similar routines as possible
7 am wake up milk for both girls
8 am breakfast for both girls
9.30-10.30 sleeping for 7month old Kotryna
10.30 little snack for both girls
12. Lunch for both
1pm sleepy time for both
3 wake up milk
5pm snack optional for both
6.3pm dinner all family
7 till 8 bath laugh time
8pm sleep

[TorsMamma]

Hi and welcome!

I would like to suggest that you read and re-read the book a few more times.

A 7 month old child needs 14,5 hours of sleep. If you have 11 hours night you will need to have 3,5 hours of sleep during the day. Also natural sleeping padderns are as follows 5 min, 20 min, 45 min, 1,5 hour, 2 hours and 3 hours. So with this in mind I would take a look at the schedule a bit more.

I would cure both the children at the same time. If you have 2 bedrooms you might feel more confident. But if they are to sleep together in the future you can cure them in the same room. The children will get the message that you are in control and don’t need to worry. The 2 year old might need to have night 1 for 2 nights and night 2 for 2 nights and so on, according to the cheetsheet.
Since it took the 2 year old 2 years to get there it will most possibly take her some more time than the 7 month old to get the message of a good nights sleep.

Have a plan, and stick to it!

Here is some inspiration for you!

"As I see it the GNS theory supplies the attitude required to render the tools successful. Without the right approach the tools won't work. With the right approach/attitude, working tools. Rich in experience, I can safely say that this is the case; it is the feeling and attitude of the obvious (approach) that determines how to use the tools and how then to proceed along the road. Schedule and tools are the basics means of action but it's the attitude that really makes things happen. The approach is like baking powder in a recipe for sponge cake! Without baking powder, nothing happens ...

Regarding the tools, I am pretty sure that one can get one's child to fall asleep / go back to sleep peacefully by singing "Jingle Bells" while doing jumping jacks on the balcony every 4 minutes - if you had confidence and a winning attitude, and of course the situation, the child and herself!
Absolutely!

This is why you need to be thouroghly prepared and well versed in the GNS theory before you can take the knowledge to heart and anchor it in your own personality. Once this is done you can modify the GNS model to suit you and your's- not an exact copy of AW. You know how it is with bad copies ... If I can, I can promise that everyone else can - I am only one among all others ...."

[Bluebell]

Hello
Thank you very much for your advices

The best thing what's happen to us is that our Swedish friend who cured her twins last year, yesterday showed us how does buffing looks like. I've got to admit I am not surprised why we didn't succed before.we didn't got it quite like that Now at least we have got a proper idea what to do !
Read the book once more last night.
Feel a bit more confident at the moment.
I know I need to do it properly this time.
Otherwise I guess it's like having a false louis vuitton bag.....

[TorsMamma]

Otherwise I guess it's like having a false louis vuitton bag.....

Well, even if you have a fake bag, it's in the attitude, you MAKE it feel like the real thing. At least to the child. 8)

[Bluebell]

Hello hello

Well I thought it's good time to give you some news!
We are doing very well
God bless Anna!

We are on the day 4 .
Everything is fine. Just 2 thing:
Girls wake up a bit in a wolf hour , will try some Mozart tomorrow.
Jingle didn't took completely over.
I still have to use some buffing and fanning briefly on little girl. If I use only jingle from outside their room, she cries cries until starts to scream.......and then it's emergency and I've got to go in.
She turns 8 months today.

What we achieved so far:

Last Friday a big dog came into our house, took all dummies away, and eaten them all....
No more dummies !
No more milk at night time.
Very good appetite!

11 and half our nights with 3 wakes up only for each.

If my Charlotte can survive without dummy and eat proper lunch, I can be ballerina

[TorsMamma]

I like the attitude here! Nice going! =D>

It is however time to let the jingle take over and deliver the same message as you do with the buffing and your presence.
So you don't jinge to then enter the room. Then the jingle only means "mom is comming in".

So just put the attitude in to the jingle. happy, smoothe, final and so on tone in it. YOu might have to say it 50 times in a row, so be it. But you MAKE her listen to it. You have the last word. This too will take some time but you need to take a step back so your child will take steps forward.

Keep up the good work!

[Luvisen]

Lovely. What progress you've made!
I just add this illustration of the jingle: \:D/

Kind regards, Luvisen

[Bluebell]

Hello
:-({|=
=D>

That's how I feel today [-o<
Honestly I would never ever believed my girls will sleep
Of course everything is not perfect yet, still working to make sure jingle will take completely over.
But good news is that Charlotte slept the whole night
Kotryna wake up only once
Wolf hour was slightly sticky, I mean we put some classic music, but they taken in like wow morning has come, let's stand up in cot and dance to the music.
I agree with them- at night mornings happening
So I think for us is better to keep it quiet #-o
Anyway I'm just telling all my friends that my girls sleep well now and everyone is writing down the name of the book.
Even in local shop this morning the lady at cash desk asked me if I been on holidays and if girls sleep better, as I use to complain to everybody.
No I haven't been on holidays yet but I had some sleep
And yes girls are sleeping better =P~
I wish I heard about the book earlier. After didn't sleeping for 2 years I really wish somebody told me about the book.
I lived in Lithuania, France And now UK . And it's first time here I hear about this book.
You guys should do some more publicity all over the world [-o<
I definitely will =D>

[Bluebell]

Sorry for typing mistakes
I meant at nights nothing happens when I talk about music

[TorsMamma]

Thanks Bluebell, hope you are enjoying life to the fullest.