Back to work and GNS

[FriFri]

I have a couple of questions regarding the GNS cure. We started the cure about a month ago. There has been some trial and error, but we are slowly getting to grips with the GNS cure. We managed a full night sleep by the second night. And the first two weeks the day naps were not a problem.
Frida sleeps through the night; however her day naps are more like 20 or 45 min the last week. I am not too worried about that as it is in working progress, however any advice is more than welcome.
My main concern for now is me starting work in October.
Frida who is 7.5 months will be home with me two days a week, one day a week at nursery and the rest of the time with her grandparents. Her dad will also have an increased exposure to putting her to bed, and being in charge of the some weekends.
Due to this I am worried how it all will work with different people being involved.
Her current schedule is
07:00 wake, breast/bottle
08:30 nap (1.5h)
10:00 breakfast
12:30 lunch
13:30 nap (1.5h)
15:45 dinner
18:30 breast/bottle
19:30 bed
I do not have a suitable pushchair for tummy sleeping, so Frida sleeps in her cotbed for both naps. However I would like for her to have a go at sleeping in the pushchair on her back, but I am unsure how to go about it?
Any advice on how to manage her naps at nursery? They have a communal sleeping area. What should I tell the nursery staff to do when they put her to sleep? Could they do it without the jingle?
What about at her grandparents, how should they go about putting her to sleep? She has her own room with a cot at their house. We had a trail run last week with the afternoon nap. That did not work at all. Was it too soon?
Please let me know if you require more information.
Your help is very much appreciated.

[TorsMamma]

Hi,

These are difficult questions to which I almost have no answer. You see there are just as many solutions as there are problems regarding this. The most important thing is to have the “attitude of clarity” when putting a child to sleep. You see if the once who are doing it don’t believe in it, it won’t work.

In the nursery most caretakers have a good routine in regards to how they put children to sleep. You could tell them about the jingle and see if this is something they feel comfortable with. If not it is just going to have to be the way it is. The most important thing to do here is KEEEP THE SCHEDULE. It is the routines that need to be regular, without them the child will never listen to the jingle.

When it comes to grandparents, the same thing there, train them if they are interested keep the bedroom even during the day pitch black. If they don’t feel comfortable with the GNS routine nothing will help. So they need to see the positive upside to this and the jingle to stay alive.

So I would as step one, make sure that the schedule is in aligned with the rest of the world, keep the times no matter what. She will then adjust to the environment. The rest is “attitude”!

Here is a quote from another thread

As an old member aptly said:

Som jag ser det så tillhandahåller SHN-kuren (AW) det förhållningssätt som i sin tur gör verktygen funktionsdugliga. Utan rätt förhållningssätt funkar inte verktygen. Med rätt förhållningssätt fungerar verktygen. Rik av erfarenhet så kan jag lugnt säga att så ÄR det Det är känsla och attityd av självklarhet (förhållningssätt) som avgör hur man hanterar verktygen och hur kuren sedan i sin tur fungerar. Schema och verktyg utgör själva basen men det är förhållningssättet som får saker och ting att hända . Förhållningssättet är som bakpulvret i ett recept på sockerkaka ! Utan bakpulver händer ingenting...

Angående verktygen så är jag alldeles säker på att man kan få sitt barn att somna/somna om lugnt om man sjunger ”är du kär i mig ännu Klas-Göran” och hoppar 8 hoppsasteg baklänges med en röd och en grön gummistövel på fel fot ute på balkongen var 4:e minut - om man bara hade tilltro och ett vinnande samt självklart förhållningssätt till situationen, barnet och sig själv ! Absolutamente

Därför ska man vara så påläst att man kan ta kunskapen till sig och förankra i sin egen personlighet samt att våga agera som egen person i kurens alla moment - inte en kopia av AW eller Mammut. Ni vet hur det är med dåliga kopior... Om jag kan, så kan jag lova att alla andra också kan - jag är bara en Mammut bland alla andra....

roughly translated:
"As I see it the GNS theory supplies the attitude required to render the tools successful. Without the right approach the tools won't work. With the right approach/attitude, working tools. Rich in experience, I can safely say that this is the case; it is the feeling and attitude of the obvious (approach) that determines how to use the tools and how then to proceed along the road. Schedule and tools are the basics means of action but it's the attitude that really makes things happen. The approach is like baking powder in a recipe for sponge cake! Without baking powder, nothing happens ...

Regarding the tools, I am pretty sure that one can get one's child to fall asleep / go back to sleep peacefully by singing "Jingle Bells" while doing jumping jacks on the balcony every 4 minutes - if you had confidence and a winning attitude, and of course the situation, the child and herself!
Absolutely!

This is why you need to be thouroghly prepared and well versed in the GNS theory before you can take the knowledge to heart and anchor it in your own personality. Once this is done you can modify the GNS model to suit you and your's- not an exact copy of AW. You know how it is with bad copies ... If I can, I can promise that everyone else can - I am only one among all others ...."

[FriFri]

Hi Tina,

Thank you very much for the prompt replay

Yes, the attitude bit, I have come to realise it is such an important factor in the process. So we will make sure to continue that, and pass on the message to the involved parties.

I will read the security chapter again. I am at the moment not sure why you think I should do a “mini-cure” again, unless this is meant to be done at her grandparent’s house?

I will let you know how we get on with the sleeping when I have been back at work for a couple of weeks. The routine has been laid out to fit around everyone’s timetables, so it is just to wait and see if the timetable can survive the real life situation.
I am truly grateful to know that there is somewhere to turn, if I need support and-or some inspiration
Many thanks!

[TorsMamma]

Hi again, SOrry for the confusion. I just wanted you to read the "attitude" part, not the minicure part. It was taken out of context. So just read the "red" text in my quote. The rest are my words.

Good luck!

[FriFri]

Hi Tina,
Frida is doing quite well with the change of me going back to work. We have just finished the second week and the grandparents have been excellent in adopting the GNS way of doing things.

There are still issues with getting the full 1.5h sleep during the day naps, especially in the morning; however I also have this problem. Any advice are welcome
We will start the nursery in 3 weeks time and I will feedback anything of interest.

I have however another situation on my hands. Frida has started waking up 45min after she has been put to bed for the night. She has suddenly started doing this the last 5 days I was wondering if you have any idea why? She sometimes manages to settle herself back to sleep. But the problem when she does wake up is that she automatically goes into sitting or standing position, and that makes it much more difficult to calm her down and get her back to sleep. Should I when she is calm, do the jingle again as I walk out?
Your help and advice is much appreciated

[Luvisen]

Hello FriFri,

This sitting-up and standing-up bussiness happens to most kids it seems to me. The best advice I got was to give my child the confidence to lay down on his own. This is best done by letting the child sit-up or stand-up during daytime and then encourage the child to go from sitting/standing to laying down . When the child is doing this you applaud enthusiastically so the child really feels confident in doing this motion. Repeat several times a day.

This way when Frida wakes up in the night you can just jingle assertively so she feels again the confidence to lay down on her own in the dark . I also padded my sons cot a lot so I didn't have to worry about him falling in a way that could hurt him.

Hope this is helpful.

Kind regards, Luvisen =D> =D>

[FriFri]

Hi Luvisen,

Thank you very much for your replay and advice.
I shall make sure to have a go, sounds like good fun

All the best,
Frifri

[Luvisen]

It is good fun. /Luvisen